Vandpire: Karen Twelves
Improvises: Adrian Vasquez, Dane Fox McGraw, Sean Nittner
System: Yes, Vandpire by StarshineScribbles
Karen’s improv practice for Party Onwards (her fantasy improv troupe) was down to three people who could make it (Karen, Adrian, and Dane) and that wasn’t quite enough to do a practice, so instead she pitched running Yes, Vandpire, and invited me to join. Yay!
The pitch of the game is that vampires have it rough these days and they need to find a place where they can still feed without being noticed, no place better than a late night improv theater. I love it.
We created our three characters, which we realized by the end of the game were in a three person trouble called the Three Bears, as we were three bearded guys that were always too this, too that, or just right.
Our three improvisers George Costanza, Bucky Walter (which no one believed at the time was the name of telephones on Boonville, CA, but I have proof here!), and Adrian’s character (Derek?) were the last ones left in the Chuckle Hutt (the name of our fictional improv theater). We were just closing up when we realized the were four audience members lingering in the lobby. We thought they were fans, but oh no, they were vampires!
So we ran. We ran to places like:
- The bathroom, where George Costanza tried to climb into the rafters but was pulled down.
- The costume shop (because all improv theaters have those, don’t you know) where we evaded the vampires by hiding amongst the props.
- To the rage room. One of the class rooms had been rented out to a rage room to help bring in some extra cash. The plan wasn’t working financially, but we did find some weapons in there as well as a 1950s refrigerator that Bucky first hid in, and was later trapped in.
- And finally to the sound booth where we hurled AV equipment down at the vampires below.
Meanwhile, we fueled our escape and comedy with the power of signature lines that we said over and over like:
- I’ll see you in the End Zone
- Only Fangs!
- And I thought it was hard to fit last time!
- Just put a duck on it
- Shut up, Baby!
- Grandma warned me about this
By the power of chuckles we also invented vampire lore, like
- Vampires must always knock before entering a closed door (but they don’t have to get permission)
- They have to count anything thrown in front of them
- If space object work is done well enough, the objects are real to them.
Our specific would be consumers were:
- K-Hole, in skinny jeans and a cardigan
- Mean Girl, with shoulder pads and bad reviews
- Eddie, the biker who might have actually liked the show, but he wasn’t going to go against the others.
- Nails, who had long nails.
In the end, with the aid of a space object Hail Mary pass that they all dove for, we recovered the key from the knocked out Eddie (ahh, Eddie) and escaped the Chuckle Hutt so we could improv another day. Sorry Vandpires.
Thoughts on the game
Delightfully unbalanced, the Vandpires never stood a chance. As long as we could keep each other laughing (thus gaining Yes, And! tokens) we were gaining resistance (the equivalent of HP) faster than they could do any harm.
Vandpires need a 4+ (on a d6) to succeed, whereas Improvisers need a 5+ but we have a bonus of +1 to +3 (based on our stand up, slaptsick, and prop traits) so whenever opposed rolls came up, we trashed them, especially if we started Improv Chains (which gave us +1 to the roll for every person participating in the chain), I wanted to give Karen the chance to get at least one of us, but the dice gods would not intervene in her favor.
